Have you ever had the feeling of a total overwhelm when thinking about starting a new project, a new chapter of your life or just doing something for the 1st time? The feeling that you don’t even know where to start?
I remember when I used to go on international assignments abroad to countries affected by wars, conflicts, insecurity and overall devastation I would always have this contradictory feeling when setting on the road. On one hand, I would be really looking forward to go on this assignment to connect with new people, try to be helpful, acquire new skills, learn many new things about life, myself, discover a new part of this world, quench my thirst for adventure. And ironically, the same reasons would also make me dread going on the mission. All this emotional investment of meeting new, even if really amazing and highly inspiring people, establishing new and hopefully deep and meaningful friendships and connections only to tell good to the same people one, two or more years later. Learning new routines, all sorts of routines, new office, new roads to work, new apartment, new products in the grocery store, new ways locals interpret traffic rules, new weekend activities, new security rules…..… simply everything.
And yes, novelty can be good for rewiring of the brain, stepping out of comfort zones, challenging the internal autopilot, but it is also a source of stress. I remember very distinctly that during the first week of my mission, I would always be seriously asking myself whether all this stress, headache and this steep learning curve was really worth it. I remember waiting a good 7-10 days before answering myself and taking any major decision as any decision made in a state of anger, desperation, fatigue or without sufficient relevant information would have been a faulty one. It did teach me, that one always needs a perspective to take a solid decision.
So, what can be a useful way to look at and deal with a new, potentially monumental task ahead of you?
- Think about Why?
Why are doing this change? Who will it serve better? What/ who will become better? What will be solved? Bottom line, how will your life look like in one, five or ten years from the moment of a new beginning? Draw a detailed picture in your imagination or even better on a paper. Internalise this image.
We often tend to forget about the “big picture” and the whole reason why we set out to do this change and in particular when we get entangled in “smaller” daily obstacles. At times, it can feel so daunting that you can’t even sleep. All the more reason to keep the bigger picture in mind.
- Keep company
Ok, well, I do not necessarily mean having a party every day, but hey if this works, five minutes of sheer happiness every day can only be good! But seriously, be accountable to yourself! Every single day! Even if for 3 minutes. Research shows that people that are accompanied or working with group and checking in with them regularly are significantly much more likely to succeed. Have your partner, your best friend, coach/mentor, your mother, whoever deeply believes in this new project you are starting accompany and support you all through the process. Report on even a small advance as well as setbacks, thinking process, new learning. Doing it alone will significantly decrease your chances of success.
- Have a Plan
But you already knew that having a solid plan is important. So, this is the “HOW”. Usually, the easiest piece and somehow we always start with that instead of the WHY. Have the plan broken down into manageable pieces, ideally with time periods when each should be finalised( I am avoiding the word deadline here:-). Make sure your plan includes a networking list of people you can turn to for various tasks and requests. People that will be happy to help you fulfil your dream.
So, in essence, the first question answers to the questions WHY ( purpose) do I want this and What ( result) will it bring ? The second and third points deal with “the how”.
I have myself recently turned my life around as well. All of it, from professional to private, including moving countries during pandemic. It looked and it is still quite a bit work but it never looked unsurmountable because I broke it down into manageable chunks and also because I wrote myself a generous list of people who can help me along the way. This is also a thank you to all of them who have been there for me and continue supporting me.